5 Ways to Be Happier Overnight

The fact is, there are as many roads to Rome as there are people. Every human being is so different and that can't be said enough. However, if you were to ask around, we are all after the same thing: Happiness.

We all want it desperately and we will stop at nothing if we think it will bring fulfillment.

That's heavy. Lest I lose you here, I've gleaned some authentic, realistic food for thought. It's nothing more than habits that EVERYONE can adopt that requires no more than split-second decisions to start practicing. It's your choice. As cliche as it sounds, happiness is just a breath away.

1. Thankfulness. Give thanks every morning for whatever speck of blessing you can see.  As you look, your eyes will see more goodness every day.

2. Forgiveness. Bitterness and anger, even when seemingly justified, suffocate the spirit like a bag over the head. Decide to forgive and move on. Forgiveness, much like gratitude, is a process. You make the choice to live in the light of these virtues and that is just the beginning. You must choose this existence every day. Some days it will be easier than others, but you will never find happiness otherwise.  

3. Say No. Understand that saying no to others is not just your right, but many times is in the best interest of yourself and your family. It can be very difficult to turn others down without feeling that you're letting them down, particularly for women. It is often to your own detriment that you over-commit, over-schedule, and over-extend yourself. Try it. Start saying no when you feel you should and see that the world still turns, your friends still love you, and the unworthy folks move on down the line.

4. Say Yes! In case you missed this, there is no gold within your comfort zone. Step outside your normal bounds of complacency and try something new. Push a little bit harder at the weights or on your run and light a fire for yourself or for someone who is watching you. Every little step counts. Try new food, meet a new friend, eat or shop at a different restaurant or grocery store. Change your story from lost to adventure. This is where the magic is and its the only way to live.

5. Shut Up and Slow Down. In this digital age people talk a lot. Much of it has moved online, but I'm starting to think that all of the aimless and self-obsessed chatter is actually causing global warming, pollution, and the holes in the ozone. You just wouldn't believe what you can hear when you stop adding your verbal refuse to the world. Give yourself permission to let things alone to happen as they may and admit to your own contribution to the world's misery. You might just find a little peace for yourself (and probably those around you). And as you experience the serenity of your own thoughts, walk instead of run, drive in the right lane once in a while, and yield to the poor soul who didn't get the memo and is speeding his way into therapy.

To recap: Gratitude is in the eyes of the beholder; when you start to look for goodness, only then will you find it. Forgiveness is a daily choice and brings intellectual, emotional, and spiritual light with it. Say NO to the requests that pull you from the path you need to be on. One-hundred bucks says that you are the person that you need to say no to most often. Nothing but mental, physical, and spiritual stagnation exists inside your comfort zone. Get comfortable with discomfort. Let your yes be a "Hell, Yes" and your no be a "Hell, no." Listen with all ears, release the iPhone, turn off the noise, and hold back criticism, opinion, gossip, and correction (especially in judgement of self). Slow your steps and your breath, and learn to experience all the little things you've been missing. Give yourself permission to feel what you are feeling.

A Nice Day for Mom

When I was a young I hated the advice "bloom where you are planted." It sounded like a cop-out or an accuse for lethargy. I have always been on the go. I'm motivated by the idea of a ladder and I always want to climb to the next rung, learn what is waiting around the next corner. I still view this as a positive character trait.

Recently I've tripped over the realization that the more I know, the harder it becomes to grow in holiness. The cornerstone of my personality is adventure and work. The more I find out about people and the wide world the further away heaven and clarity seem to be. How to marry these two things that both seem good?


I think cautiously is the only way to get on. I am thinking of my present time as a bowl to be filled with my very best effort. I want to let go of the desire for success, prestige, possessions, promotion, money, and acknowledgment. I actually believe that if I fully accept this very place I am in as where I am meant to be and use my natural energy to max-out on my tasks, what is meant to be will follow- perhaps more than if I was breaking my back for the future.

They say, "reach for the stars," and they talk about dreaming big dreams A LOT. And I don't think that is bad. But it is heavy, and it does have the potential to distract from the now. I've wasted so much time dreaming of becoming smarter, fitter, and richer. The goal is to look around me and say, "what can I do with what I've got RIGHT NOW?" Being smart, fit, rich, beautiful, white, black, strong, healthy, childless, married, or single, doesn't make me better. Accepting MY portion as what is meant for me alone, and working it to death is what makes me better than I was yesterday.

*Edit: All this to say, don't let your vision and aspiration for the future steal from the goodness of every day.

Election Stress Management

Let us go forward in peace, our eyes upon heaven, the only one goal of our labors.
--St. Therese of Lisieux

I've been thinking and feeling and wondering about Christ's mother staying so silent when she was the one person on earth who knew the most about God. There is almost nothing in Sacred Scripture about her. Her thoughts, opinions, her wisdom are mostly a mystery to us.

Then I have considered that Christ chose to veil Himself from most people. Those who searched for Him found Him. Those who were ready for Him, longed for Him, received Him.

The Mother of God was only taking part in this most frustratingly perfect mystery. She understood how grace was at work: Silently.

Nothing has changed. The Messiah is found only by those who long for the Word, as a deer longs to drink.

This is what I am breathing in as the political mayhem unfolds. I've given the silent treatment to this mess, while trying to show charity to those who haven't taken the same path. VERY few of us are called to be preachers and teachers. We must necessarily tend to our own hearts and minds.

I am taking a page from the Blessed Mother's very thin book, and keeping as much in my heart as possible. This is my part as the Almighty does His work. Amen.

She  who is silent everywhere finds peace.
--St. Teresa Margaret

Giving Freedom for Christmas

There is a pile of toys available on the other side of the room...

...and here she is playing with an old box filled with give-away clothes. You all know its true; the best things in life are free. In short, children have no masks or pretenses and if we are humble enough we can learn from them.

I am already thinking of Christmas and all the cool things I want to buy to make my children happy. But today I am reminded that the human spirit craves simplicity and order and the freedom to explore, more than all the noise and flash and color that we try to dazzle it with.

As time goes on and we drift away from childhood we forget our way home to the things and the people who matter the most.

This holiday season, I am going to focus on the natural beauty of symbolism and provide an atmosphere of peace and simplicity at home. In the end, I don't want to add to anyone's burden of possessions, but give the gift of leaving them alone to discover things for themselves. It isn't easy for mothers to let things be, and I am certain they won't be giving me the same gift. But one can dream.